I'm just now understanding my cultural identity as a second generation Hispanic American
Better later than never
Puerto Rico is known as la Isla del encanto (the island of enchantment). With beautiful beaches and kind people, Puerto Rico has a lot of charm to attract visitors. If you haven't already guessed, I'm half Puerto Rican. I get it from my father's side. I had the privilege of picking up Spanish from home and absorbing the culture through his influence. I'm also half Colombian from my maternal side but I wasn't around a lot of those influences growing up, just at a young age.
So, I have strong influences from the island and a lot of Americanization since I went to school in Florida. I didn't learn to actually speak Spanish until I was 19 years old so I was always looked at as the gringa of the family. It was hard to fit in with my family and first generation Hispanics in high school because their language and way of being is so different.
However, I really wanted to fit in and add some spice to my life growing up that I greatly accepted my paternal identity in high school. Maybe it was obvious to them that I wasn't like them because I didn't always get their jokes or slang but their celebratory attitude and happy outlook on life made it a little easier to approach them in social situations.Â
After college, we all took our different ways in life and some got married and had kids at a young age. Keeping in touch got harder and life got busy as I immersed myself in my studies. I started to question my identity and wondered who I really was as I would approach native Spanish speakers in Costa Rica and those back home in the United States.Â
My education made me feel like I stood out from the crowd and made it hard to identify with those who just didn't understand my background. I'd always have to explain myself and my father's roots to win the native Spanish speakers over with my gringa accent that they found so charming. People in the states would always assume that I was white and I would be confronted with surprised looks on their faces when I told them where my family is from. A lot of Americans already have their groups and cliques so it is hard to get to fit in with them if you're not like them. I would be welcomed in church settings so I felt a part of a group there but again my goals would take me away from socialization for a while and I had to focus.Â
I've realized that I am different in a special way. I've learned to embrace my roots and appreciate the warm culture of the people of my upbringing. Even through I am not like them I feel I can better identify with rural suburbia of the children of Hispanic Americans who are bilingual and mix Spanish with English words to express themselves.Â
I could probably best identify with introverts, creative and educated people with goals that they work towards every day. People who are knowledgeable of culture and open to new experiences. Adventurous people always willing to learn something new. There have been few people that I've actually met who identify with my background and I would love to meet more people who understand me.
I've become more accepting and patient with myself realizing that I'm unique in my own way and appreciate my father's background as foundational teachings for a moral life and rich friendships in the future because Puerto Ricans are some of the friendliest people you could meet in your life.